Transmission #2

I really do wonder if I'm bipolar.

I felt all shiny and optimistic for a couple of days.  I really did feel poised on the edge of all sorts of epiphanies and breakthroughs and such about myself and my life on this planet...

... but the Fish of Understanding slipped the hook and disappeared back under the surface.  Now I'm just depressed like usual. Surely there has to be some kind of explanation for how I can change so drastically from day to day.

So instead of working things out and realizing things that will ultimately make me a better person like I set out, I shall instead make a list of what was good this weekend:

1.  It was the weekend.  I didn't have to go to work.  Not going to work (while still within the confines of a paid, employed position, of course) instantly makes everything better.

2.  I got my hair done.  I have discovered a radiant, red color that makes me very happy and am seeking to maintain its brilliance.  It also makes me feel like a useful adult to have a regular grooming schedule where my personal care is tended to.

3.  I saw a great number of friends that I love - including (but not limited to):  Melissa, Garrett, Colby, Kris, Blaine, Libby, Melissa's Mom & Dad (who - for brevity and affection's sake - I refer to as "mom" and "dad"), Beau, Leisa - who does my hair, Chesna, Meredith, Paige, Adam  S. (I don't know why I feel the need to designate since the only other Adam is "Adam R" - my ex-husband and he doesn't live here!), and Lori.

4.  I ate Chinese food THREE times.  I love Chinese food.

5.  I cleaned some things out of my closet and gave them to friend, Kris.  This freed up space in my closet and made me feel helpful.

6.  I brought in a lovely girl who cleaned part of my house for me (the other part will be next weekend.)  This is huge because my house is a continual source of guilt and embarrassment for me because it is so beautiful on the outside (and will be again on the inside, my Cleaning Fairy assures me) and yet we have done such awful things to it by living in it.  I want to have people over again!!!

That's really it.